The Greatest Quest #

My first blog post! Enjoy it -- it was a time capsule of my current feelings on hope and games.

Part I: The Myth of the Inevitable Future

Consider me a member of the formerly-hopeless. There reached a point where my knowledge of human cruelty and indifference expanded to the point of existential despair. I was, quite reasonably, unable to singlehandedly stop the continuation of all that I thought was wrong in the world. In a sense, I found great relief in that, because, if everyone had the power to singlehandedly change the course of the world at a moment's notice, that would be a very chaotic and unpleasant world! Then, I came upon this quote:

"We live in capitalism. Its power seems inescapable. So did the divine right of kings."

The entire speech this came from is fantastic, but this small fragment really touched me. Imagine going back in time and telling a medieval serf that the magistrate would one day hold no power, or that the monarchy may not even exist. I'm sure many a serf would struggle to believe it.

Many of the systems that surround us, no matter how big or small, often seem inescapable. And it does not help when people in positions of power (whether political, social, or capital) decree that a certain path is THE future. These statements are, in effect, trying to manipulate, and also trying to leave little room for discussion. It can imply that the future is predetermined, and no disagreement is allowed. But in truth, there is not one destined future, and every action we take impacts the future.

In my path out of the pit of hopelessness, that path that rejects the myth of the inevitable future, I discovered the wonders of community, education, and action. For the past few years, a blooming hope has governed me. And with that sense of hope, I gathered 3 friends, and sat them down at a table with some dice.

Part II: Setting the Scene

I open the book for the role-playing game system Quest⁽⁰⁾, which states:

You play the game by having a conversation with your friends. It begins like this:

First, the Guide describes your scene to help you imagine the world and what is happening nearby. Next, you say what your character does. You can do anything you want, like talk to other characters, attack, or use one of your special abilities. Then, the Guide imagines what happens next and describes the scene again.

So, it was my task to paint the scene. Having known of others' issues with scope creep, I was on a mission to concoct a tight 3-hour adventure in a confined location. So, I decided on a set of small islands, and did quick world building by borrowing details from my hometown, including naming characters in the world after important figures in town history.

I called my 3 friends, and tasked them with creating characters to inhabit the world⁽¹⁾, and then we set off on a daring adventure, in which they used their abilities and teamwork to stop an evil wizard from blockading the islands with a magic storm. It was ... riveting! We all surprised and delighted each other⁽²⁾. They wanted more.

Part III: A Most Utopian Hobby

Note that I said a most utopian hobby, not the most utopian hobby. Now, when you think of a better world, what do you see? Perhaps, like me, you see one where we take care of the environment, where we take care of our communities, where we not only respect everyone -- we welcome them into our family. The larger TTRPG community is not immune to this vision; why? I think it is because TTRPGs are a development of one of the most human behaviors -- telling stories around a fire with friends.

Whether intentional or not, there are many that try to convince us that we need immense riches and resources in order to be happy, and there are many that declare that dominion over others is the only way forward. I find such immense joy in the simple rebuttal of these notions: we need barely anything to be happy -- just some friends, a table, and some dice. In a world so digitized, TTRPGs needn't deal with any of that; there is enough intrigue in letting one's imagination mingle with another's.

Part IV: Walking On The Table

I have always struggled to find the right artistic medium. When I was in music school, I struggled to write music for a long time after dealing with a stalker. Accessing my emotions was difficult, and when I was ready to confront them, the abstractness of the medium of music was a barrier⁽³⁾. After I graduated, I made an attempt at video game development, which I found never really fit me.

Last week, I felt like I was at a tipping point -- should I even still be making video games⁽⁵⁾? It's a question I had been asking myself for over a year. I had many a creative idea, but fitting them into a game was quite akin to fitting a square peg into a round hole. Why was I making a video game? I ended up shuffling the ideas around in my list by medium, and found there wasn't really a strong pull towards and medium. When I started imagining many of these ideas as TTRPGs, things began to click, and I began to feel at ease.

Now, I am left with great hope, not only that I can realize my creative dreams as TTRPGs, but also that I can make this world better. I can volunteer; I can start a club; I can plant a tree; I can help someone; I can teach; I can learn; I can build a better future. To me, this is one of the great joys of being, of existing in this world.

Thus begins the greatest quest of all: Living!

⁽¹⁾Consider me a fortunate DM, because I have the honor of saying that one of my players was so hooked on my one-shot that they wrote a narrative backstory for their character. If you were intrigued on hearing more about the game or its world/characters, that backstory discusses more of the details of the world.

⁽²⁾The players in my campaign managed to save the day without killing the evil wizard -- consider me very impressed at the outcome!

⁽³⁾I have since regained my love for music, after years of therapy and much work on my own to build confidence in myself. Music has been a part of my life for a long time, and the abstractness of the medium doesn't bother me anymore (nor does the vulnerability of writing music), I just take the ideas that need a stronger narrative and move them to other mediums.

⁽⁵⁾To be clear, I have no objections with others making video games -- it was purely a question I was posing to myself.